Volume 19 Number 78 Produced: Tue May 30 22:42:56 1995 Subjects Discussed In This Issue: Coed [Michael Lipkin] Mixed Dancing (3) [Jeff Woolf, Ari Shapiro, M. Linetsky] Sex Change Operations [Akiva Miller] Transgendered persons [George Max Saiger] Women's Finances [Yaakov Menken] ---------------------------------------------------------------------- From: <msl@...> (Michael Lipkin) Date: Tue, 30 May 1995 13:04:44 +0500 Subject: Coed >From: Meir Shinnar >One more point. R. Moshe Feinstein zt"l tshuva on coeducational >schools is often cited. It should be remembered that R. Moshe had a >consistent educational philosophy. He opposed the teaching of girls >Torah she bealpe (the Oral law), and he opposed college education for >men. The ban on coeducation is but one part of this philosophy. Actually, he had several teshuvas on the subject of coeducation. Notwithstanding Meir's attestations to know Rav Moshe's total philosophy in education, one of those teshuvas specifically permitted a coed situation rather than have the girls go to public school. Further this teshuva dealt with ADDING girls to an already existing boys elementary school! Meir's use of the term "ban" in reference to Rav Moshe's philosophy is illustrative. You generally ban something that is already in existence. Were coed yeshivas really an issue in the early part of this century? Maybe rather than ban coed, Rav Moshe (and other poskim) were being called upon to affirm the halacha in a relatively new frontier. The teshuvas which I've seen were asked from the vantage point of a school administrator who was looking for a heter (exemption) to the norm of separate SCHOOLS. If, in fact, separate was the norm then (contrary to an assertion made by Aliza Berger some time ago regarding a "dearth" of teshuvas on the subject) the burden is squarely on the shoulders of the pro-coed camp to provide responsa from reliable poskim supporting coeducation as a l'chatchila method of yeshiva education. To date nobody has answered Tzvi Weiss's plea for such responsa. Michael <msl@...> ---------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Jeff Woolf <F12043@...> Date: Mon, 29 May 95 15:44:39 IDT Subject: Re: Mixed Dancing It is quite true that in a series of Takkanot issued by R. Judah Mintz (d.1507/ Grandfather-in-law of R.Meir Katznellenbogen of Padua), there is explicit acceptance of mixed dancing and careful regulation of how it should be done. There are, moreover, very clear responsa of R. David of Corfu (RaDaKh) and others describing dances held on Shabbat. The issue at hand in the latter case was the abuse of authority of the dance master but not of the dance itself. HOWEVER, the type of dance involved is a stylized, group affair such as the gavotte or the minuette in which lines of men and women are directed by a 'maitre de la danse' and in which physical contact between men and women was minimal (with some handholding). This was accepted by Italian Ashkenazi Poskim from the fifteenth century onwards. With the creation of the Waltz, which involved one on one exclusivity (remember, you need to 'cut in' to change partners?) the situation changed as did the normative ruling. There is a contemporary discussion of the issue in ShUT Benei Banim by Rabbi Yehudah Herzl Henkin (volume 1). Rabbi Dr. Jeffrey R Woolf Department of Talmud Bar Ilan University ---------------------------------------------------------------------- From: <m-as4153@...> (Ari Shapiro) Date: Mon, 29 May 95 13:22:16 EDT Subject: Mixed Dancing <It should be understood that mixed dancing is by no means <clearly wrong. There are tshuvot from noted poskim (I believe the <Maharam miPadua among them - I will check the sources) who permit mixed <dancing between singles and between people married to each other who are <tahor. While some Poskim objected strongly (I believe the Maharshal), <others permitted. Indeed, the main objection of some poskim was dancing <by people married to others. Even that was permitted around Purim. I think it is clear that the majority of Poskim prohibit mixed dancing. I don't think you will find a single posek nowadayas who permits it. There are many positions taken by Rishonim and early Acharonim that are categorically rejected such as the Ra'ah holds that you only need one set of dishes for meat and milk l'chatchila, how many people do you know who follow this Ra'ah, and so and so on. I think this opinion about mixed dancing falls into that category. < Though he correctly quotes the Shulchan Arukh I have severe doubts <how much this is observed in most communities. I know this is not observed in most communities. I quoted this to make a point that Chazal were very worried about interactions between men and women and tried to limit these interactions as much as possible. Ari Shapiro ---------------------------------------------------------------------- From: 81920562%<TAONODE@...> (M. Linetsky) Date: Tue 30 May 1995 10:17 ET Subject: Mixed Dancing In vol 72 someone stated that the prohibition of mixed dancing is not an unequivocal one and seems to ellicit some proof for permitting it. It may be worth mentioning that Rav Kook wrote sharply against the early practice of Benei Akiva of mixed dancing comparing it to the light headed way of the gentiles. This was his position dispite that mixed-dancing conceivably may be used for the sake of Qeruv and that we are dealing here with the unmarried youth. What ever way we look at, if it was at one time permitted, if the specific conditions of the generations denounce it as dangerous, we must resort to higher standards and it is not unknown in Judaism to prohibit something if it becomes exceedingly popular among the Gentiles. True, Rabbi Abraham Maimonides argued against this point in much vigor and claimed that imitating Gentiles is prohibited only if there is a Biblical prohibition, (He permitted by the way to bow to the ground during qedusha) since we must know where to draw the line and should we not pray because gentiles pray he exclaims? However, this opinion does not seem to be too popular today. Raising one self to a higher level of standard is not unknown either. It is a well know Talmudic statement that a pious man should wear a over garment that covers his legs. This does not necessary mean that he should wear a long coat but should have his legs covered, but in the days of the Talmud it appears men wore Roman apparrel (?). However, covering the legs has become a norm since Jewish social standards demand it and when all of Israel (if this the case) accept a higher standard, it becames the norm. This may be said of mixed-dancing. Michael Linetsky ---------------------------------------------------------------------- From: <Keeves@...> (Akiva Miller) Date: Thu, 25 May 1995 01:25:02 -0400 Subject: Re: Sex Change Operations In MJ 19:68, Joel Grinberg asks "How much respect am I obligated to show to these individuals" who have undergone a sex-change operation. I agree that such a mutilation of G-d's handiwork is abhorrent indeed, and I would have difficulty referring to such a person as "she". But please!!! Are we talking about murderers or Nazis here? We are talking about people with a severe emotional problem, and they have chosen castration as an attempted solution. Please show some sensitivity. This is not a case of bein adam l'chaveiro (violence to one's fellow human) nor is it a flagrant rebellion against G-d's system of nature, but rather a desperate attempt to reconcile a masculine body with a confused mind. How do you treat co-workers who indulge in extra-marital sex? How much respect do you show to co-workers who engage in homosexual activity? Do you actively disrespect them as well? Woe unto us, who have chosen to build ill will instead of setting a positive example. We have long since lost the ability to effectively reprimand our fellows. Let us not alienate them altogether. Akiva Miller ---------------------------------------------------------------------- From: George Max Saiger <gmsaiger@...> Date: Sat, 27 May 1995 23:07:26 -0400 (EDT) Subject: Transgendered persons There was a reccent posting from Joel Grinberg which asked how much respect he ought to show people who had done something he found abhorrent sexually: < Twice in the past all the emplyoees in my division were advised that < some individuals have gone through a sex-change operation, and will be < coming back as "women". < Employees were ordered to treat these individuals normally and < courteously. I wonder what Judaism's attitude is on the matter. This < kind of thing is most abhorrent to me, and I believe that I would have < difficulty in working with such persons. How much respect am I < obligated to show to these individuals? It is fortunate that the query comes just at Shavuos time. In Emor, just after the delineation of the Shavuos sacrifices, is a pasuk (Lev. XXIII,22) regarding Peah (not harvesting corners of the field). Peah and Shavuos are thus linked; and peah is the mitzvah par excellence of showing respect to the poor (whose poverty might or might not seem abhorrent to the hardworking entreprenurial landowner) by allowing them to gather, indistinguishably from the paid workmen. This mitzvah teaches, among other things, that one is required to show respect to all people--even if you don't like what they are doing sexually outside business hours. Life is hard enough for transgendered persons, and I would advise Joel--indeed, I'd beg him-- to behave "normally and courteously" to them. Hag Sameach to all MJ readers, George Saiger ---------------------------------------------------------------------- From: <menken@...> (Yaakov Menken) Date: Wed, 24 May 1995 01:14:55 -0400 Subject: Re: Women's Finances Eli Turkel wrote: > Yaakov Menken writes: >> A woman has two models to choose from: >> A) The "Housewife" - accepts support from her husband. If she happens to >> earn money, she gives it to him in return for his support. >> B) The "Independent Working Woman" - does not accept support. Earns her >> own money, and KEEPS IT. No obligation EVER to support her husband. > > This is a misleading simplification. Eli would have a good point, if he were right. But in reality, the omission of extraneous details does not render a simplification "misleading". Though this may be too far back in m-j history to recall, my original post was prompted by a writer's speculation that a woman cited in the Talmud as "tzavcha" - crying in protest - was expressing frustration because she could not control her earnings. The post specifically claimed that the poor woman was forced to hand over her pay envelope. The post was incorrect, and it was that specific issue that my own comments addressed - accurately. >1. A husband has the right to the "produce" of all financial holdings > that his wife brings into a marriage ("nichsei melog" and "nichsei > tzon barzel") with some minor exceptions. Yes, this is true, and if option (B) had been "the rich heiress" it would also be relevant. However, option (B) is "the working woman", and a woman's _earnings_ follow different rules. [Incidentally, my impression of the independent "working woman" who wants to control her finances is not one who lives off of Daddy's (or Mommy's) inheritance.] >2. If a woman chooses option (B) of Menken she does not get to "keep" > the money. Instead it is used for investments and the husband again > gets the "produce" of these investments. (Bet Shmuel in EH 80) Umm... no. If my description omitted the bathwater, Eli's omitted the baby. According to option (B) of the Shulchan Aruch, she keeps her earnings and uses them for her expenses. If she makes more money than she needs, the excess is effectively loaned to her husband (in return for his obligation to redeem her from captivity) - and like any loan, she cannot charge interest. He can invest and keep the profits. The earnings themselves... are hers. >3. If the wife is the principal supporter of the family it is not clear > that she has choice (B) (see EH80 in Beer hetev and Pitchei Teshuva). I'm not certain what Eli refers to here. There is a dispute in EH80 whether a woman must do certain "household tasks" even if she supports herself - but supporting her husband is not a "household task", nor does the above remove her control of her earnings. > Yaakov further states >>> If she's having a bad season, she says to her husband, "support me!" > I couldn't find anywhere if she has the right to continually change >her mind between the two options. My error - this is a dispute. See 69:4 - the contrary opinion says that this would give the woman total license to take advantage of her husband. > In conclusion the rights of a woman over her earnings before and >during the marriage are severely limited. _This_ is a misleading simplification, because the husband _also_ loses control over his earnings. The Shulchan Aruch (EH69) says that when a man marries a wife, he gains 10 obligations and acquires 4 rewards. He writes the checks, but his new host of obligations amount to a lien on his account. Most importantly, he is given no options whatsover in defining the husband/wife financial relationship - but a _wife_ can choose to reduce those lists to 9 and 3 respectively. By doing so, a woman who so desires can retain full control over her day-to-day earnings and expenditures. We can play semantics for months, but no one would deny that the Talmud creates a complex interdependency between husband and wife. A woman (or man) who wants no financial obligations or rewards from the other partner has only one option: don't get married. My own post was carefully constructed as a response to a specific inaccuracy, not as an attempt to create a myth of a financial "open marriage" in Halacha. Thus I don't think the accusation of being "misleading" was fair or accurate -- nor did the response do a better job of summarizing the several pages of applicable laws. Yaakov Menken <menken@...> http://www.torah.org/genesis/staff/menken.html (914) 356-3040 Just Remember: "LEARN TORAH!" Project Genesis: <learn@...> ----------------------------------------------------------------------
End of Volume 19 Issue 78