Volume 30 Number 05 Produced: Thu Nov 11 6:12:01 US/Eastern 1999 Subjects Discussed In This Issue: "Mature" "Love" discussions [Moshe Nugiel] Art, pornography and our community [Paul Shaviv / CHAT] Helping Children with Gemorah (2) [Hillel (Sabba) Markowitz, Neil Parks] helping children with Gomorra (homework ) [Anonymous] Mi Sheberach [A.J.Gilboa] Negiah (2) [Ellen Krischer, Gitelle Rapoport] New Orleans Lending Library Open [R. Hartline] Pardes [Larry Rabinovich] PRDS [Shalom Carmy] Public Displays of affection [David Zilberberg] Second day yom tov [<millerr@...>] The value of the Ketubbah [Larry Rabinovich] ---------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Moshe Nugiel <friars@...> Date: Sun, 07 Nov 1999 22:58:21 +0200 Subject: Re: "Mature" "Love" discussions Gitelle Rapoport writes: >One of my nephews' teachers at a yeshiva high school once told his class that they should not see the film "Schindler's List," despite its powerful portrayal of certain elements of the Holocaust, because it has a nude love scene and scenes of naked Jews in the concentration camps.> "Schindler's List" is a good example. I saw it and I thought it was absolutely inappropriate for high-schoolers, or for adults for that matter. Let us grant that the scenes do not arouse the prurient interest of the viewer (which is probably untrue for the high-schooler.) I would still argue that a very negative impact is made upon impressionable viewers. The hero of the film, Schindler, treats women as mere objects. The villain sadistically beats his house-maid. What possible positive benefit can be derived from such entertainment? There are many books and movies which offer "powerful portrayals of certain elements of the Holocaust" without the gratuitous abuse and negative role modeling. Such filth should never be allowed to enter the consciousness of our children. The potential good, viz., learning about how awful was the Holocaust, is certainly outweighed by the potential harm of introducing into our children's awareness deviant behavior patterns. For this to be done with a parent's blessing is, IMHO, not in line with normative Jewish parenting principles. Moshe Nugiel ---------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Paul Shaviv / CHAT <pshaviv@...> Date: Mon, 8 Nov 1999 11:36:46 -0500 Subject: Art, pornography and our community Writing this only hours after reading the haftarah of Hayye Sarah (David and Avishag), and then coming across a new book on tznius ("Oz vehodor levushah" - publ by Feldheim -- plus the newly-issued 'Supplement', with detailed sketches of 'kosher-non-kosher' female dress), I take a few minutes to ponder. 'B'kitzur' -- the penalty we pay for not allowing discussion / appreciation of any issue -- sex, culture etc - that gives our community the ability to learn, appreciate and discriminate between the tasteful and the meretricious is that our sense of taste becomes non-existent, and the community then becomes vulnerable to the cheapest and worst of popular culture. That is then adopted under the banner of being 'with it'. A less controversial example than sex is music, where the frum community has adopted / adapted the worst and cheapest of modern music, and, tragically, seems to think it is wonderful. A more controversial comment (made by others before me) is that in their ostensible disavowal of all sexual interest and display, many Orthodox communities have created societies that are more highly charged with sexual energy than the surrounding cultures in which we live. You gain little by forbidding a handshake when every woman in shul is dressed to kill. Our kids (and adults) are going to see, hear and otherwise encounter every image of popular culture. We need to educate them on how to develop taste and judgement so that they can distinguish between pornography and art, whether visual or written. (One might also say that such faculties would obviate the need for books such as the new one on tznius referred to above, which has pages on, eg different types of womens' and girls' socks, stockings, neck fasteners etc.) What art or literature they wish to enjoy is another matter, but as several contributors have pointed out, in the past the Jewish community (especially the Sephardim) has been able to accomodate a wider range of enjoyment of life than we do currently. You only have to read Shir Hashirim carefully to understand that even it is a metaphor, it is a metaphor couched in extremely explicit sexual imagery. Paul Shaviv, Headmaster CHAT - Community Hebrew Academy of Toronto 200 Wilmington Avenue, Downsview, Ont M3H 5J8 <pshaviv@...> Tel: +416-636-5984 Fax: +416-636-7717 ---------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Hillel (Sabba) Markowitz <sabbahillel@...> Date: Wed, 10 Nov 1999 20:08:03 -0500 Subject: Re: Helping Children with Gemorah Here in Baltimore, there is an organization (Yesodei HaTorah) which is set up in order to have shiurim on all different levels for adults. We have shiur and chavrusa in a beis medrash setting. This has enabled people who had never learned gemoro to begin as well as people who have been to Yeshiva to continue to learn and raise there level. Speak to rabbonim in your community about setting up a program. It is much better to have a program for a community than attempt to begin as an individual. Since the Baltimore program began, similar programs have also been set up in Seattle and Atlanta (and I think some other communities as well). This is a benefit not just for an individual, but for the entire Jewish community. If you are interested in finding out how this is done, e-mail me and I will put you in touch with the head of our program, Rabbi Tzvi Goode. Said the fox to the fish, "Join me ashore" | Hillel (Sabba) Markowitz Jews are the fish, Torah is our water | Zovchai Adam, agalim yishakun ---------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Neil Parks <nparks@...> Date: Tue, 9 Nov 1999 15:14:36 Subject: Helping Children with Gemorah Here in Cleveland, the Fuchs Bet Sefer Mizrachi, in conjunction with the Torat Tzion Kollel, have addressed this very situation by creating a program in which parents are invited to study the same gemorah that their children are learning. Perhaps if there's enough demand your friend's school might consider doing something similar. For details you could write to FBSM at 2301 Fenwick Rd., Cleveland, OH 44118. ---------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Anonymous Date: Wed, 10 Nov 1999 12:11:34 -0500 Subject: helping children with Gomorra (homework ) I am not really at that stage yet -- my daughter is just 3 -- but I have seen friends with their children and it seems that in the new generation, helping children with their homework seems to have become a sacred institution. I remember that when I was growing up, I never even thought to ask my parents for help, let alone have a regular "chavrusa" with them to get my math or chumash homework done. I see my friends spoon feed their children answers and *rob* them of the wonderful experience of working through a challenge by themselves. These parents have the best intentions in the world but their children are going to grow up deficient in independent problem solving. Wouldn't it be better for parents to stimulate their children's development by challenging them independently of the framework of school, like talking about current events or history or science at the dinner table "as if it is something that actually is interesting" or having a steady chavrusa with them on a *different* maseches than they are learning in school (maybe a mishnayos seder) to *complement* what is done in school, or a Navi chavrusa -- there cannot be a parent in the world no matter what his/her level of formal learning, that cannot enrich his/her child's understanding of the stories in the n'viim rishonim with his/her life experience and wisdom (all they really need is a hebrew/english nach, or even just an english one), and how many adults or children learn enough of the n'viim?. As many posters pointed out, the lesson of love of learning and the time spent together are certainly more important for a child's development than the actual content covered. And it is a shame that so many children are being robbed of the wonderful experience of independent discovery. ---------------------------------------------------------------------- From: A.J.Gilboa <bfgilboa@...> Date: Wed, 10 Nov 1999 10:33:27 -0800 Subject: Re: Mi Sheberach Nice idea! Another decorous minhag that I am aware of: After the END of tfilla, the rav or hazzan waits for congregants to approach him and he makes a private and quiet mi she-berach for each and every one who requests it. This avoids both tirha d-tsibbura and qri`at ha-tora (`ayin of qri`at is intentional!). I believe I saw this minhag in action in the Sfardic congregation of Philadelphia. As for individual mi she-berach for each `ole, I have seen a general mi she-berach "...et kol mi she-`ala ha-yom la-tora" before returning the scroll to the aron qodesh. Almost no break in the entire parasha! Yosef Gilboa` Rxovot ---------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Ellen Krischer <krischer@...> Date: Mon, 8 Nov 1999 09:27:24 -0500 Subject: RE: Negiah > I found a great paperback Sefer called Pri Yitzhak written in easy > Hebrew by an anonymous author. It's really a compilation of existing > halachot with extensive references. Is anyone else disturbed by the notion that we should learn halacha by reading a compilation of sources selected via unknown criteria by an anonymous author? Ellen Krischer ---------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Gitelle Rapoport <giteller@...> Date: Wed, 10 Nov 1999 15:41:41 -0800 (PST) Subject: Negiah Danny Schoemann writes: I would be very careful about referring people to an anonymous author as an authoritative source. Real scholars are not quite so shy. While I unfortunately do not have the time at present to find or look up all the sources listed, I think we should all remind ourselves occasionally that all such sources (on any topic) must be taken in context and along with other sources that may present a range of opinions. One observation: >Touching a Nidda woman or any married woman is a >Torah prohibition Vayikra 18:19) - Rambam Isur Bia >21. The Rambam in 21:1 specifically refers to hugging and kissing a woman *derech ta'avah* -- i.e., in a sexually desirous way. One of the sources on Mr. Schoemann's list, the Shach, Yoreh Deah 157:10, quotes the Rambam as dealing with such activities "derech chibat biah" -- in an affectionate manner related to sexual intercourse -- and points out that many amoraim hugged and kissed their daughters and sisters, who were certainly prohibited to them sexually as "ervah" -- presumably because there was affection but no sexual element present. We also have to be careful about which opinions are considered halacha l'maaseh and which are not. For example, shaking hands, discussed in this book, is in contemporary American culture a polite social courtesy generally lacking sexual connotations or intentions. If shaking hands were in the category of "yehareg v'al ya'avor" (a person should die rather than commit the sin), a very large number of halachically observant people I know would have been dead a long time ago. Gitelle Rapoport Bid and sell for free at http://auctions.yahoo.com ---------------------------------------------------------------------- From: R. Hartline <jtpub@...> Subject: New Orleans Lending Library Open The first of two Breslov lending libraries is now open in New Orleans. to find out more about our library program please call Ruven Hartline @ 504-779-5998. A second lending library will, I'YH, be open in one of the local shuls within a month. ---------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Larry Rabinovich <lrabinovich@...> Date: Wed, 10 Nov 1999 10:43:13 -0500 Subject: RE: Pardes Like my friend ari kahn i am unaware of any earlier use of pardes as an acronym for four different types of interpretation than the late 13th century. It is not unlikely that this system derived (neutral word) from christian biblical interpretation which closely read every verse in the bible pursuant to one of four methods.(the four do not coincide directly with the pardes categories but two or three of them are pretty close). The pardes system is different in that it assumes that every verse is subject to all four types of "pardes." larry rabinovich ---------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Shalom Carmy <carmy@...> Date: Wed, 10 Nov 1999 09:34:42 -0500 (EST) Subject: PRDS An article on the term and its divisions appeared in Journal of Jewish Studies circa 1981. ---------------------------------------------------------------------- From: David Zilberberg <ZilbeDa@...> Date: Tue, 9 Nov 1999 10:13:38 -0500 Subject: Public Displays of affection To this I would add the wording of the Aruch HaShulchan (Even HaEzer 21 (I think)), who prohibits public displays of "chiba yiseirah" rather than "chiba" which is how the Rema terms the prohibition. david ---------------------------------------------------------------------- From: <millerr@...> Date: Fri, 24 Sep 1999 04:33:15 +0200 (IST) Subject: Second day yom tov It seems that the accepted Halacha(I don't have the sources in front of me) is that an Israeli on a short visit to the USA is prohibited from all melacha even d'rabbanon even in private [I'm not so sure this is such an accepted Halacha. My understanding is that melacha can be done but only in private. Mod.] Why is it different then any ma'ris aiyen which permits doing a Rabbanan privately? reuven ---------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Larry Rabinovich <lrabinovich@...> Date: Wed, 10 Nov 1999 10:54:10 -0500 Subject: RE: The value of the Ketubbah Several years ago I spoke at a conference of Jewish Law here in New York on the subject of currency in Halakha. During one of the other sessions relating to Ketubbah questions, one of the audience members, an Israeli professor of Jewish Law, suggested that the true value of the Ketubbah was $20,000. (Some YU rabbeim have suggested this as well). The speaker, an old timer, whose name i forget, said "oh no, it's much less than that." During a break i calculated, based on the value of silver that appeared in that morning's Times that the amount was about $150. I showed the calculation to the speaker who told me that that was the amount that Rabbi Feinstein had told him was the correct figure. Larry Rabinovich ----------------------------------------------------------------------
End of Volume 30 Issue 5