Volume 45 Number 10 Produced: Mon Oct 4 7:31:04 EDT 2004 Subjects Discussed In This Issue: Chazarat Hashatz [Nathan Lamm] Gemar Tov [Batya Medad] Kiddush Customs (2) [Nathan Lamm, Martin Stern] Names - Shneor [Leah Perl Shollar] New Chumrah [Carl Singer] Partial Following of P'sak [Akiva Miller] Shneur [Pinchas Roth] Wedding Customs (3) [Batya Medad, Jeanette, Martin Stern] Yemenite customs [Martin Stern] ---------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Nathan Lamm <nelamm18@...> Date: Tue, 28 Sep 2004 14:03:50 -0700 (PDT) Subject: Chazarat Hashatz Mike Gerver reports seeing Sefaradim and Yemenites reading along with the "Hekhe Kedusha." I know that there are strong grounds to support all people doing this (so that the chazzan will say those first brachos with a tzibbur), and I know many Ashkenazim (including myself) who do so. The sources for Hekhe Kedusha in general are so sparse that it's hard to track down precise "rules" in any event. (For example: If davening along, does one say L'dor Vador, or Ata Kadosh?) Nachum Lamm ---------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Batya Medad <ybmedad@...> Date: Wed, 29 Sep 2004 11:44:34 +0200 Subject: Re: Gemar Tov Does anybody know the origin of saying "gemar tov" rather than "Gemar hatimah tovah" between Yom Kippur and Hoshana Rabba? The rabbi of my local shul pointed out, to my mind quite correctly, that "Gemar tov" means "a good end,", which can be understood as referring to a person's death! He commented ironically, "I'd be afraid of a gemar tov!" I was under the impression that it's a sort of slang, for those too lazy to say the entire phrase. Of couse, just lke common un-grammatical slang, it's literally incorrect. Chag Sameach, Batya http://shilohmusings.blogspot.com/ ---------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Nathan Lamm <nelamm18@...> Date: Tue, 28 Sep 2004 14:07:34 -0700 (PDT) Subject: Kiddush Customs Just a further note to those who pointed out that in some families, all above-bar mitzvah boys say kiddush. This is the custom in my family, and I didn't realize until late that it wasn't the norm :-) My father's explained it as wanting us to get used to it- chinuch, in other words. If we have many guests, or even one or two who may not have the custom, only my father will say it. And if some wish to and others don't, well, that's what happens. At other tables, we listen to the host unless offered to say ourselves. Nachum Lamm ---------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Martin Stern <md.stern@...> Date: Wed, 29 Sep 2004 09:23:12 +0100 Subject: Re: Kiddush Customs on 28/9/04 4:42 am, <billbernstein@...> (Bill Bernstein) wrote: > <<Those with the opposite custom might see it as a chovah for one person > to make kiddush for the whole assembly because of 'berov am hadrat > Melekh" and therefore consider the alternative as assur (prohibited) > because of a possible berakhah levatalah.>> > > Someone who is willing to view his host's actions as "assur" probably > has no business eating out at other people's homes. > > I find the whole discussion funny in one way and sad in another. People > come to my house or I go to theirs and I am well aware of different > minhagim and their reasons. I am perfectly willing to accomodate just > about any of them. I would expect the same, more or less, of my host. > I certainly would not expect that my minhag will be labeled "assur." It > is a sad state when we have come to where our social relations require > piskei halakha. I fear Bill has misunderstood the point I was trying to make. At issue is whether "berov am hadrat Melekh" is a factor which has to be taken into account or not. Minhag A holds it is and therefore, lekhatchillah at least, one person should make kiddush and be motsi everyone else. Minhag B holds that it is not and therefore each person is allowed to make kiddush independently. As far as I am aware nobody holds that there is an obligation for each person to make his own kiddush and davka not be yotsi with the baal habayit. If this is incorrect perhaps someone can quote a source for this opinion. The only possible exception would be a very large gathering in a hall so large that some people might not be able to hear the baal habayit. There is a basic consequence of this analysis which makes the two minhagim unequal in application. Someone following minhag A should not make kiddush in a house of someone following minhag B since, for him, this would raise a possible issur and he should therefore ask his host to be motsi him. The host should not consider this as against his minhag, though he may consider his guet a bit eccentric, since he only holds that there is a permission for others to do so, not an obligation. On the other hand, someone following minhag B would not be going against his minhag if host is motsi him. The host could certainly allow the guest to make his own kiddush if he wishes since (i) one cannot force someone to be yotsi if he does not wish to be, and (ii) there are opinions that allow it. The only problem which might affect the host is that, if the guest makes kiddush first, he should follow his own minhag and let the guest be motsi him. To avoid this, I suggested that the host ask the guest to make kiddush after him. I consulted my rav on this matter who, while he agreed with my analysis of the underlying halachic controversy, disputed whether there is a minhag B, which he described as being in reality a ta'ut (mistake), at all. He held that it should not be encouraged and one should only allow guests who feel strongly on the matter to do so for reasons of derekh erets for the reasons in the previous paragraph. Martin Stern [As a quick note, my father zt"l was of the same opinion as Martin's rav, that minhag B is an error, and that Kiddush should always be made by one individual for the group on Shabbat / Yom Tov, if at all possible. Avi] ---------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Leah Perl Shollar <leahperl@...> Date: Wed, 29 Sep 2004 09:34:38 -0400 Subject: Re: Names - Shneor > >>I was under the impression that Shneor was a Hebrew name. As I heard > >>it, a couple each wanted to name after his or her father -- Meir and > >>Yair respectively. They compromised, and called the child "Shneor" -- > >>two lights... > > Since the plural of "or" =light, in Hebrew is "orot" the name would have > been "Shneorot" but it is rather Shneor, therefore, "Shneor" =two > lights..." is simply folk etymology. Jonathan Baker is indeed correct > when he suggests that Shneiur is based on Seņor. Accepting that the 's' could become 'sh' is fine, but then the name would be "Shenyor". It would still need to undergo the shift of the vowel from the first syllable to the second. Doesn't it seem more likely that the "ot" of orot fell into disuse? Also, there are no other names in Jewish tradition meaning 'mister', while there are names that connect to like, such as Feivish or Feivel, which derive from Phoebus, meaning light. If the 'mister' was to indicate status, wouldn't Spanish Jews have stuck with 'Don', i.e. 'sir'? The closest to 'mister' that I can think of is Bunim => bon homme, and that clearly shows we are talking about a special mister (Shem Tov), not just any mister... Leah Perl ---------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Carl Singer <casinger@...> Date: Wed, 29 Sep 2004 06:46:18 -0400 Subject: New Chumrah > In MJ 45:02, Carl Singer wrote about tissues: <<< Perhaps they are > packaged in such a way that there is no possibility of tearing as you > pull one out for use -- i.e. there is no perferation connecting > consecutive sheets. We need more chumras, so I'm looking forward to > Shabbos tissues. >>> > > Why do you consider this a chumrah? My understanding is that when one > tears a perforated paper along the perforations, that constitutes the > melacha (basic category of forbidden activity) of "mechatech", which is > defined as cutting something to a specific size or shape. > > Akiva Miller Of course the tearing even along perforations is forbidden, and that's not what I'm talking about. Ordinary tissues (Kleenex, if you will) even though they are packaged as individual sheets which are interleaved for dispensing purpose (not perforated at all) can sometimes stick together and thus tear as they are being dispensed. They are manufactured from what is called a "parent roll" -- a large (6 foot?) roll of tissue paper which is slit and cut and folded and packaged .... . The possible chumrah is was referring to someone who would claim that their tissues are somehow less likely to stick and tear and thus are more Shabbos-worthy. And thus we'd get "glatt tissues" Carl Singer ---------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Akiva Miller <kennethgmiller@...> Date: Wed, 29 Sep 2004 09:19:54 -0400 Subject: Re: Partial Following of P'sak In MJ 45:02, Chips wrote <<< It is not clear that Rav Moshe would hold that using Shabos timers would still be a problem as most people understand what is going on. >>> I think it is significant that Rav Moshe wrote his opinion on this subject (Igros Moshe, Orach Chayim 4:60) in 1977. Shabbos clocks were already quite popular and entrenched in the Shomer Shabbos world by then, and I really doubt that there's been any change in the public's understanding of them in the years since. In other words, I see no reason to think that Rav Moshe would say any differently today. Akiva Miller ---------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Pinchas Roth <pinchas2@...> Date: Wed, 29 Sep 2004 16:58:49 +0800 Subject: Shneur Matthew Pearlman wrote: > The name Shneur is actually mentioned in the Ramban's drasha on Rosh > Hashana, so has a very old vintage. If I remember correctly, the Ramban is referring there to one of the brothers who headed the Evreaux yeshiva, in 13th century Normandy. (See E.E. Urbach, Baalei haTosafot, pp. 479-485). Their father's name was Shneur. Their culture was entirely French-Ashkenazi, which is why I found it unconvincing that the name Shneur is derived from the Spanish. I suppose it is possible. Does anyone know of an earlier use of the name? Chag sameach, Pinchas ---------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Batya Medad <ybmedad@...> Date: Wed, 29 Sep 2004 11:55:36 +0200 Subject: Re: Wedding Customs >A similar question -- at weddings >Do bride and groom walk to the chuppa with their respective parents OR >groom with (both) fathers and bride with (both) mothers. When we first came to Israel (1970) every wedding we attended, if I'm not mistaken, had the bride with the two mothers and the groom with the two fathers. Today here in Israel we see both, but our crowd is very international, and rabbis tend to be flexible to adapt, within halacha, the couple's wishes. There's lots of individuality. Batya http://shilohmusings.blogspot.com/ ---------------------------------------------------------------------- From: <FriedmanJ@...> (Jeanette) Date: Wed, 29 Sep 2004 06:29:22 EDT Subject: Re: Wedding Customs at my first wedding I walked down with the two mothers and so did all my siblings. . at my second wedding I walked down with my parents, and my mother said, as we were walking down the aisle, that she had always wanted to do that--walk a child to the chuppah with her husband. jeanette ---------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Martin Stern <md.stern@...> Date: Wed, 29 Sep 2004 08:36:06 +0100 Subject: Re: Wedding Customs on 29/9/04 5:26 am, Bernard Raab <beraab@...> wrote: >> A similar question -- at weddings >> Do bride and groom walk to the chuppa with their respective parents OR >> groom with (both) fathers and bride with (both) mothers. > > I have never seen or heard of this. Has anyone? > > [Yes, I have seen both customs. Avi] These two customs certainly do exist though it is not clear to me, from what he writes, which one Bernard has never seen. There is an interesting anecdote about Rav Yaakov Kamenetsky z"l on this matter. Someone once asked him which was his minhag to which he replied "Whichever makes the mechutanim happy". Apparently he followed this through in practice by following different ones at different childrens' chuppas, something I have also done. Martin Stern ---------------------------------------------------------------------- From: Martin Stern <md.stern@...> Date: Wed, 29 Sep 2004 08:46:40 +0100 Subject: Re: Yemenite customs on 29/9/04 5:26 am, Jack Gross <ibijbgross@...> wrote: >> From: Martin Stern <md.stern@...> >> This phenomenon occurred throughout the Jewish world where the >> introduction of printing produced standardised texts and led to local >> customs being abandoned. > > I believe the printing industry similarly contributed to the elimination > of Selichot from the Yom Kippur shacharit, musaf, and mincha services. > The selection of Selichot varied with time and locality -- as evidenced > by the range of dates of authorship in the weekday Selichot. > > Because of that non-uniformity, the printers simply incorporated the > local custom by reference ("Der Chazen hebt ohn Slach Lanu un m'zogt > Selichos, dernoch sogt men dos: Zechor Rachamecha..."), leaving it to > local communities to produce their own texts. With time, even that > instruction was largely dropped. This certainly happened in Eastern Europe as Daniel Goldschmidt points out in his introduction to the Yom Kippur machzor which includes almost all the selichot ever recited in any Ashkenazi minhag. In the machzorim printed in Germany (Heidenheim, Sachs), they were included so the German communities continued to say them, giving out a list of those to be said, which varied from year to year depending on how late YK terminated so that there would be no need to make a break e.g. between mussaf and minchah. This was true of the earlier English ones such as Routledge and Shapiro Valentine which followed the same pattern. Martin Stern ----------------------------------------------------------------------
End of Volume 45 Issue 10